Today’s post is from Rhiannon Skeen, a great blogging friend of mine. We are swapping testimonies and sharing our hearts for Jesus with each others readers today. Please show her some love and following her (all links at the bottom). Be sure to go check out my post on her site.
Discovering Who I Am Through Falling in Love with Him
I grew up in a Christian home. My parents were good, godly people, my dad was even in the ministry for most of my life. From the outside looking in it looked like I should have had confidence in who I was. My parents loved me and they loved God, surely that was enough to give a kid a great foundation for knowing they were loved?
My early childhood was pretty normal. My dad worked, my mom stayed home, the kids went to school, we all went to church, it was peaches and cream. Then, when I was around 7-8 my dad felt the call to go pastor a church. We left our home, our church, our friends and moved a couple of hours away to a new life.
The years there were good. We learned a lot and we made great friends. That wouldn’t be the last move or transition in ministry. Over the next 8-10 years my dad transitioned about 4 times and we moved 3. During these years I was growing and when I hit my teenage years life got hard.
I Hated Me
I was always the fluffy one in my family. I weighed more and I knew it. As a child I didn’t think too much about it but during the early teen years it really started to depress me. This pushed me into dangerously low self-confidence and hate for myself. I hated how I looked and there were many times I seriously considered ending life altogether. “Surely death couldn’t hurt as bad as I was hurting now,” I thought.
I survived my teen years, barely, and as I entered my 20’s life took a turn for the better. We had moved back to our home state of Tennessee and I had just graduated from junior college. For the first time ever I was about to spread my wings and leave home. I was university bound and I was scared as all get out!
Changes for the Better
Going into college was a huge leap for me but moving 5 hours away and going to a university? That was pushing me waaay outside of my comfort zone. I had no idea how Lee would change me, but God knew and He knew it would save my life.
At Lee University I majored in Children’s Ministry. I took Bible classes and ministry classes and in the mix somewhere I began to fall in love.
Yes, I did meet my future husband there and fall for him too but the first love I found was something I had had all along: the Word.
Even though I did grow up in a godly house surrounded by the ministry I never learned how to love the word for myself and I never learned how to study it. I knew I was supposed to read it because that is what “good Christians” do but I didn’t know how to really take it in. It was because of this that I had struggled so much during my teen years. I had allowed the lies of satan to tell me who I was not because I had no understanding of who I was in Christ.
The enemy loves to get us to walk in less than we are because if he can prevent our potential he can limit our testimony. When he limits our testimony there are lives that aren’t impacted. Our story impacts others, but if we never allow God to tell us who we are and how to use it then we can never reach our full potential in Christ.
As I began to develop a love for the Word I began to see that all those things I had called myself for years was a lie. God was flushing out the lies and destroying them with His truth! Darkness cannot handle when Light walks in which is why we need the light of the Word daily.
Ever since college life has changed. I got married, started a family, moved back to my home city, and started a blog based ministry. I’m a mom and wife that is crazy in love with Jesus. I found out who I was because I fell in love with the One who created me. That same passion is for everyone. If you walk in pain or darkness there is hope and there is light. It all begins with Jesus and realizing that He is the love of your life.
I had to realize that my desire to be loved by a man was really my desire to be loved by the King of Kings. No man, no-thing could ever fill that until I really knew love for Jesus.
Now my heart beats to spread the message of identity. I walked in lies for over 20 years and God has put a passion in me to help others not have to go through that. Our identity is birthed out of intimacy and getting to know Jesus really changed everything for me!
Rhiannon is a mom, wife, blogger, designer, vlogger and coffee addict that can be found at http://rhiannonskeen.com . That is her corner of the inter-webs where she shares her heart about life and loving Jesus. She also hops on to vlog from time to time and you can find her over on her YouTube channel HERE .